“hank, i didn’t see the harry potter on midnight of opening day like you did, but i went to see it last night with the yeti and we were sitting there, like, thirty minutes before it started and the theater was filling up and i was like, ‘i am so excited about the harry potter movie! i get to see luna lovegood and i’m gonna’ cry at the end.’ and then i really liked the movie because it was funny, but it was also sad, and it didn’t tell destructive lies about teenage sexuality like some other movies i’ve seen recently. and ron weasley has gotten so buff. i mean, hank, the movie was great, but the thirty minutes before the movie started was what i love about being a nerd. because nerds like us are allowed to be unironically enthusiastic about stuff. we don’t have to be like, ‘oh yeah, that purse is okay’ or like, ‘yeah, i liked that band’s early stuff.’ nerds are allowed to love stuff, like jump up-and-down-in-the-chair-can’t-control-yourself love it. hank, when people call people nerds, mostly what they’re saying is ‘you like stuff,’ which is just not a good insult at all. like, ‘you are too enthusiastic about the miracle of human consciousness.’”
Maybe ‘Okay’ will be our ‘Always’
This video amuses me.
So many people have seen this video that I feel like I should make a semi-public statement about it. So:
When I was 20 or 21 or whenever this was filmed, I was an inveterate liar. (I am still a liar, but I’ve gotten better about not claiming fiction as fact.) The story as I tell it in the video above is true only in the broadest outlines: In real life, the prank was planned by my friends and I had a tiny role in the whole affair. It was a great prank, although not quite as great as I make it out to be in this story, and the true heroes of the prank’s legendary success were the men and women who planned it (not me) and of course the performer herself.
I put myself at the center of the story in this retelling because A. I was 20, and B. there was a girl listening, whose laughter you hear a few times, and I had a huge crush on her and thought she would like me if she believed I was behind this hilarious prank, and C. I’ve always kind of cared more about the quality of a story than accuracy.
On some level, I was probably already in the process of repurposing the actual events for fiction. (Those of you who’ve read Looking for Alaska will no doubt recognize the prank.) But anyway, I am always a little embarrassed to watch this video, not only because I was such a dumb ass, but also because my friends who actually did this are brilliant and hilarious pranksters who deserve acknowledgement. (Of course, I won’t name them, as they are now all successful women and men—doctors and financial planners and whatnot—who no doubt do not wish this particular video to appear amid their google results.)
Also: I WAS SO SKINNY.
Okay. That is all.
Also: YOU WERE SO FUCKING HOT.
Okay. That is all.
This illustration nicely tracks the progression of my physical and emotional well-being during this process.
GIANT SQUID OF ANGER!!!!
Complete with fake and probably incorrect scientific name. Of the languages that I am learning, Latin is not one of them.
Silly super fast sketch to get me mind of the perils of lettering my comic book and reading the Odyssey. Oh Odysseus, you’re such a jerk.
I don’t know if it’s just because I’m a nerd or what… but this table is just plain awesome!!!!!!! I wish our school had it!
This goes in every park on Nerdfighteria Island.